HEARTLESS WOMAN....

The showers you obtain are your emotions…… In the shower singing my heart away, In this case my showers are cold like my heart, In the shower singing my heart away…. Just singing to the cold clear water as if it was you. Inspecting the bitter and chilling water run down my weary and wounded body……. Just singing, Singing like my existence depended on it…..over the days your tried and overly used body wont stand for anymore cold showers… Soooooo I would assume your showers well become more warm, in hopes that your heart well to,
Even the songs you may sing well become brighter forthermore enjoyable. Although people can also craft your showers to be shorter then you would like them to be. Everyone started out with warm showers and loving there self in it. Don’t get me wrong my showers were once hot as well as enjoyable because of one person, now there cold and long…….I HATE THEM!

Lips shaking… Heart barely beating yet the only thing that’s keeping you alive is the songs you extreme dislike to sing but you most keep yourself alive. Why can’t he keep you warm in that cold water you stand freezing alone in? Even though that shower is cold with one but he can make it warm. That cold water will soon turn warm and extended like you like them, yet you stand in that cold bitter solid shower singing all Leona songs in tell your body and heart is cold and solid with no way of bring it back to know what love is and how it feels to be loved. So now you’re a cold and barely alive heartless woman in this world of unhappiness with only memories. So you hunch over curled up holding yourself to stay alive and loveable yet you’re mad and disappointed in you self so you’re not holding yourself as tight as you should. HEARTLESS WOMAN!!!

true story

WONT LET GO!

When it’s all said in finished we can’t never let each other walk off. It’s just not possible in life. We’ve been though too much to let are self misplace each other there no way no how. It’s crazy how people can modify people and compose them a whole dissimilar person in and out all though some era it’s not constantly in a high-quality way. in this case I’m thankful that he helped me uncover myself....



when it’s all said in done I just won’t let you go and you don’t consent to let me go no matter what. I thought we was going to leave on terrible terms, I was going to be truly miserable .we made it through an additional difficulty problem that we have been going though for months . Nothing can stop us ,spending the last 48 hours with you and getting that last kiss mint the world to me and can’t wait to get that kiss back.


I don’t even know why I’m even doing this after all that ish that happened I just don’t comprehend myself any longer.

p.s

you was my best friend ...... sigh now I forever think about you every were I go and songs I hear and events at the club, food I may eat and how I sleep-in. I know you and you know me :/sigh fuck man I just don’t know anymore I’m loosed , I don’t know what to do

All I know is this I’m not going anywhere and I love you so much you’re my air and I can’t breathe without air. Listen to Justin nozkua makes me miss you so much. To miss someone that damage you so much doesn’t make any since at all. Why miss whom who hurt you and changed your existence in a way that doesn’t fit you.

Not just done with this one. so come back!!!

EMO HUH????NAW!

Ladies check this out never enlighten a guy how you feel or anything regarding you in tell you distinguish if its for real even then be cautious furthermore maintain your grid up at all times. cause the last thing you need in your existence is a guy that don’t care about you and never did even though you would give him the world and extra, it’s a disgrace how love can hurt those who love to love their love ones. Ladies look when you express your love for someone they will discover your weakness and us it against you that well leave you to a broken heart that well take forever to heal.soooo don’t do it just don’t. You don’t want to end up like me at all. Feeling sad for reason you cant explain, lonely at all instance even though you may be hanging with friends you still sense along and down, nor may you might not have anyone to aid you through this madness of love. At the end of the day it seems like the only one that can construct you to feel better is the person that may have got you to this point but be aware that he may not know he did. Maybe he do you just never know? So just truest your mind and not your heart because your love will be in love and won’t be able to think about what’s best for you. Love just goes off of love and noting more. So my conclusion is fuck love because love doesn’t love you when you want to be in love.Sigh:/

To share what your heart is informing you not to trespass is killing your emotions every time you enter, So obey your feelings and your intelligence well lead your heart in the way you need to go and not were you think you wanna be. Cause love well always take you to places where you never wanted to go in the first places. A places where you feel discarded, not appreciated, used, not cherished, played with and never loved or the sense of loneness and you always cry every day.Nevertheless however your heart feels that how you well feel in tell your heart heals, and who knows when that is. So just keep you in you and don’t share it with anyone cause some people don’t know how to treat other peoples feelings other then there’s.Love won’t never discover you when you’re down and blue, gloomy and heartbreaken but who cares, love impair those who seek for it and wish to find in someone they adore.

SHOT OUTS BABY

its for yal.hope yal like it.

people i miss here we go thee shotout list!!!

1.all my hater!!!
2.mother .10.erick
3.ray.........11.coke
4.half........12. jarren
5.brian .....13.maya
6.ben 14.oh yea did i say my hater?
7.jalay .......15.ana
8.jasmine ..16.alex
9.frantastic getting teird stoping
17.tony miss you

DOES HE TALK?

TALK BABY TALK!!!!HEHEHEHE

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE YESYES!!!

THERE IS NOTHING GREATER THEN TO BE LOVE BY SOMEONE WHO WILL ALWAY LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT.

YESYES

HIS THE WORLD................

NO ONE CAN COMPARE TO HIM NO WAY SON!!!

YOU DID A GOOD JOB BABY I LOVE YOU

PASSION

Let’s get genuine.
ya dig


The passion that people present or obtain isn’t always good or factual. To share passion is hard and not always straightforward for most people. You have to appear passion in the eyes before you can award it away.
I know I haven’t gazed in passion eyes.
I’m too terrified and my eyes are wound from life and what my I eyes see everyday.
*strained eyes
*red eyes
*tried eyes
*baggie eyes
Possible pink eyes.
Dry eyes is what I have …..Eyes!
Eyes with no voice or story. Eyes! That when you gaze in them you see nothing but decomposing dreams and passion. Passion that you dare not discover nor seek for, its hard to refund passion that been used and abused
(Unwanted and thrown away)
(Lied to and never loved)…yet you hungry to receive.
I extremely dislike destroying my feelings that I feel when there present, nor do I want to misplace them in the stuggle. When you fight for love and passion you’re falling for yourself and the end of whats keeping you alive. Hold on tight to what means the world to you and your heart forth more your senses. Those who fight never succeed. You must fight your heart away in tell your heart is shaking on the ground screaming for your love.
YOUR LOVE.

Yet it still dies from all the pain you caused it. Dreadfully suffering for you and the disappears that drowns me at your feet. The brokenness of shame that’s in the atmosphere….kills. Kills passion that burns in your veins.
I can’t breath!
Must I breath?
Must I live without you?
I must!soooooooooo
So I can be free from sorrow and disappointment.
I want to be free.
FREE to go and run…run anywhere and everywhere I please! Free from you isn’t what I want but must get free. It’s a must, it’s a need. It’s a desire. I want you and I need you. You’re a want a NEED and a desire.

The one you want near is the one you want around.
Around as in there?
Observe not what’s near but what’s near is far. What ever happened was never meant to happen yet your still absent-mined about what happened when it never occured. To explain the past is to die and came back with one leg three arms and one eye.
Isn’t worth it.
The present is the further yet the past was never there. I’m Imprisonment with you not being there or near my side. We are a system that is an envelope which is disorganized.

Life is death waiting to happen.

The shell I shall lay in.

Within an egg shell remains cant move, legs pressed on to your torso. Am in an effin egg shell, apprehensive about when I shall every approach back out.
Out !
Out to observe the humankind !
Out to deliver your self to your corpse!
Out to comprehend guys and why they construct your egg shell so diminutive and unconformable.
Im sooooooo in a nut shell which is close to several egg shell I recognize.
I want to brake free from whom placed me here to stay and engrave my heart away.
Must I be here?

Must I live like this, in this shell that means nothing to me at all but my existence which is slowly falling according to god and his weal?
I’ve been out and about yet that’s the reason why am here.
I’ve never been in an egg shell before nor do I want to stay furthermore resume my life.
I’ve attempted to perform everything I could to stay out off this eggs shell of mine.

What lies beneath that solid firm shell that lays there in this unmarked place?
Feel the need to brake out and show my beauty but too scared of resentment of life and people hurtful comment.

Wait wait maybe its best to stay in this unconformable eggs shell I think I shall call home…yes home!!
Its way better then benign cracked open when you’re not yet ready with your insides spilled any were and every were it shouldn’t be. Your body shall move and spill how ever you lay and see things that hurt you. Right now my bodies every were. Disgraced to declare I must put myself together once again. Hopeful the pieces are not too small.

Don’t allow any individual to brake you diamond eggs shell. I know I did.

Back to that unconformable eggs shell I call home.
Well....
Bach to were I can’t get hurt.
Back to that shell that keeps me hugging myself every minute of the day.


THANK YOU SHELL!!!!!!!

why yesterday:/sigh

Yesterday...I thought to myself ummmm why are things the way they are? ... Why are the heavens blue?
Why do we drink cold water then hot water? Why are people the way they are?.... What makes people the way they are?
Why?
Why do I seek to know what I shall never find out?
Why are people more glorious then you?
Why are you the way you are?
why is are existence ending as we speak?

Why did god make you the way you are now and how you're surviving in the insignificant intense world.

So I decided to answer my own question.... So I had call my extended misplaced companion name ummmmm Lets seeeee ummmmm yea her name was jenny yea jenny.. That’s her name and am sticking to it.... so she had told me that she had sat in the mirror just looking at her self. Why was she the way she was??..... She sat in the mirror for a good 37 mins just thinking about all the things she don’t like about herself. The list went on and on. She never stops and thought about one thing she loved about herself....

Why judge diverse in what we fancy in this world.She was the girl that was near the handset and don’t want to converse about anything or to any one... So I was thinking some times people make you who you are and how you are today. People take what they hear from people and run with it and never give it back. For her to be the way she is now is simply what people thought of her and that made her how she is and how she thinks about herself today.

she's confound to her bitterness of her theory's of her imagination of that reflection she's gazing at.
Destruction she thinks.....
Remembrance of herself nonstop the life she wants to surpass.

Why for the most part the world is unbearable and sorrow. Are life is not intensive.
Am simply asking why?
Why most people capture jenny down when she seeking to be apart of humankind. Her dreams are so far away!
Why?

Why most life be so intervened by the once she adore the most. It’s like what’s the point of being yourself if you can’t be what you want to be in life.

Why must there be someone in this world hurt or abandon.
~Loosed and frightened.
~Put down and never put back up.So I think the reason why things are the way they are is how we make it and how god wants us to live.....

We don’t quality direct opposite thoughts of what we see in the reflection nor do we possess the permission to think other wise.
Shamed to say why?I guess things are what they are and there’s no changing it….... I assume.

ITS YOUR WORLD

The world is so immense and profound, yet it’s satisfying my every need and aspiration.
I can’t hold it up on my own.
There too many problems of life that with cling to me from my strength and influence.
There’s several people with there fabrication that follow them but carry me down.
Helplessly falling,
There are too many people.
Why can’t the world be light and trouble-free to survive and love in?
Why must people weight you down by setting right on top of the world, meaningful that your frustrating and doing all you can from keeping your world from diminishing and creasing to the ground?
So you pick it up little by little with every one on your world.
That’s right it’s your world do what you please.
Destroy what you want. Sheik what you want to drown.
Brake what you want brokening.
(Excepts heart)

Your world is your position of life and collections of your belief and dreams you posse inside you. Follow up on moments you’ve have and infatuation you gave away. Just let it go and reveal your unforgettable love you cherished for years. Never try to attract the forbidden love.
But guess what it’s your world.
Love who you want to love.
Cut people you want out your life.
Offer away your love designed for the one you adore/admire.
Do what you please.
It’s your world fuck the people that’s in it!!!

MISSING PAPI

Well holla people from this crazy world, I have return discouraging to say I need to express myself in away that I hate to do but I have to do something.

ready!

set

rawr I dont want to go.

some body push me!!!

PLZ!!

DO IT DO IT NOW!!

sweet

(white gril voice through the whole story )

ITS DONE
ITS OVER
ITS ENDED
ITS WAS GREAT
IT WAS WONDERFUL
IT WAS FUN
IT WAS WEIRD
IT WAS INTERESTING
OVER ALL IT WAS TOTALLY WICKET

PARTING IS SUCH SWEET SORROW
AS MY DUDE SHAKE SPEAR WOULD SAY
RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT
AHH!!! HE NOT TRYING TO HEAR ME THOUGH.
YOU KNOW WHAT SUCKS IS WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENS THAT YOU WISH NEVER HAPPENED OR SAW IT COMING.MAN THAT’S ALL TO THE BAD.ITS NOT A VERY GOOD FEELING.I LOSED SOMETHING VERY WEIRD TO ME.I DON’T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED.

I GUESS THATS JUST LIFE YOU KNOW,THAT HOW LIFE GETS ITS PLEASURE.
MANNNNNNNNNNN SIGH
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, LIKE GOSSH
SIGH SOOOOOOOO WERE WAS I WERE WAS I OH!! YEA
HELL YEA THOSE NGs STOLE MY EFFIN RIGHT SHOE.
WEIRD ASS SONOFABITCH THEY ARE.WHY THEY HAD TO STEAL MY RIGHT SHOE DAMN!!!

WAIT WAIT WAIT THATS ANOTHER STORY
SILLY ME TRICKES ARE WITHOUT A DOUBT NOT FOR KIDS

NEVERTHELESS I MEET THIS HOT GUY AT THIS BASKETBALL GAME RIGHT (SMAKING MY LIPS/DAY DREAMING).
I WAS REALLY ENTRANCED WITH THIS STRANGER WITH PRETTY HAIR AND GOOFY WAYS.
I WAS SO LIKE DIGGING HIM LIKE DEEPLY!!!

(WHITE GIRL VOICE)
SO WE TALK ON MYSPACE AND WE WOULD ALWAYS TALK ABOUT HANGING OUT BUT WE NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT.WE BOTH WAS ALL TALK ,BUT I WAS ALL TALK,SHY AND SCARED ALL AT THE SAME TIME EWW.HE GAVE ME HIS NUMBER AND I WAS LOL TO LOL SCARED LOL TO CALL HIM FUNNY RIGHT
BUT THAT’S JUST ME BEING SHY ME, WHAT CAN I SAY.

LMAO

WELL THIS STORY IS INTERLAY TO LONG LET ME RAP THIS UP.
SO WE FINALLY HONG OUT FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS.I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME WE KISSED.
YOU WERE COVERING UP MY EYES WITH YOUR HANDS AND MOVING ME CLOSER AND CLOSER TO YOU.THEN ABOUT THE SIXES TIME YOU KISSED ME WITH YOUR HAND COVERING UP MY EYES.THAT WAS SO CUTE.
*GOOD TIMES GOOD TIMES*
MAN I SURE AM GOING TO MISS THAT KISS.IM REALLY GOIN TO MISS THOSE KISSES AT NIGHT WHEN YOU WOULD ALWAYS HOLD ME TIGHT( SIGH).MEN I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF.I WANT YOU BUT I CAN’T HAVE YOU.RAWR ITS EFFIN HARD.
WE SHOULDN’T WORRY ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE AND WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY.I JUST WANT TO BE WITH YOU.
TO BAD IT’S NOT WHAT I WANT.
THAT FINE…..THAT EFFIN FINE.
WHO AM I KIDDING ITS NOT FINE IM GOING TO MISS YOU LIKE SHIT. EVERY TIME I THINK ABOUT THIS ALL I CAN DO IS FROWN AND I SWEAR I DON’T MAKE PRETTY FACES WHEN I FROWN.

FREAK I CANT TALK ABOUT THIS ANYMORE.I DONT WANT TO FINISH.

BYE

SIGH:/

WAIT WAIT YOU SAID WE SHALL TRY AGAIN AND LETS DO THIS RIGHT.

WE SHALL.

READY

SET

IM GONE ALL READY!!

check this.the nexts time a werido come in my life and eff up something i tried so hard to put together.imma konfoo slice HER yaa yaa yaaa yaaa!! !!

straight up!!!!

ordinary people

ordinary people
by:john legend
kind of dig this song right now
lising to this song makes you think.
It makes you think about life and how people make mistakes but we're all just human.
There are no person better or greater then the nexts person.We all need to realize that and start understand people in way we never thought we would.

We're just ordinary people trying to find love and are selfs in this world.
We desire truth and find ourselfs nothing but uncetainty.
Everyone needs to start loving there self no matter what maybe the case.We owe it to are selfs, I know I do.
I am very digusted with myself simply because I never stop and thought about how smart I am or how pretty I maybe or just good things about me period.I always look for the bad things about me and the little things people say but dont really mean to say but hurts me inside.

I long for happiness,but foolishy crush it like an enemy.
We're just ordinary people we dont know which way to go.

mysterious man

Well people of America I have revealed the black figment mysterious man casting a shadow in the front of the bright blinding light that with lies behind him...

so bear with me.

I don’t quit possess what I know nor what I wanted to know about this mysterious man. Perhaps that man is me looking at the gloominess of myself and what’s in me. perhaps his the representation of my existence or just life in general.Naw fuck all that his just a unknown man that I will surly get to know and possibly love.I’ve haunted everything I’ve desired to know about what I don’t want to know in the first place. Gazing at the substance of his clothes from was the shadow meets my eyes. Constructing what i can out of what i cant see is all I got.
(BATMAM T-SHIRT)ummmmmmm
Convince on what I never saw was weird for some reason, I knew that body from some were and that weird shaped head.It looked oh so formular.
I was invisible to this black mysterious shadow man. He couldn’t see, hear or smell me all he could see was the hair on his pillow.
+From the book invisible man+ we both have something in common. He was a man of substance, of flesh and bones, fiber and liquids-and he was known to even prossess a mind. I am invisible understand, simply because people refuse to see me. When they approach me they see only my surroundings themselves, or figments of their imagination-indeed, everything and anything except me.
Sad to say but true.
I was entranced with him .......why? I shall never know. Perhaps it’s the compassion or demands he possess. I suspect it’s that overly bright light that with lies behind him that’s lureing me in his desire. To have advantage of what you desire is what you have in life and what you need to get from it.
Why must I protest against that overly bright light.theres no accepting or running away from it. It’s like love you cant never hind or leave love behind. Trapped in love with only my left shoe and my body laying there lifeless yearning for the truth. Nerves of resentment i set back and observe the pictures, comments the disrespect furthermore the love you show for each other. I am highly disgusted with myself and with this so called mysterious ass man i know nothing of but his weird intentions for me. Perhaps I am incorrect...........frankly my concepts of his intention are maybe genuine.
why was he the way he was? Maybe if he came out from in front of that bright blinding light I could see the real him and what he has to share with me.
Possibly if i came out from the darkness of love the light wouldn’t be so bright on his side. You never know maybe he well be the one to grab me and take me out the dark and show me some of his light that with lied behind him.
what do you say?

Notes

so the whole concept of this peom or storie type things was in the picture i was in a dark room all alone with me myself and just my thoughts..... pretty much the man that with lied behind that overly bright light was someone i never knew and never really understood....its like when your in the dark for so long its hard to glaze in to something so bright ...so then you really cant see the people thats near as clear as you should......